Sunday, 8 July 2012

[PICS/FICTION] My Final Encounter (updated)

Feeling tired Jae.....shhhhhhh...just go to sleep. I just sit here in the corner until you wakes up. You look so beautiful Jae even when you are sleeping. How can anybody be so handsome and yet so beautiful at the same time. You are so lucky to be blessed with such good look. Take care of yourself Jae. Please don't drink and smoke too much. I want you to live longer so that I can tell my grandchildren what a beautiful person you are.

Ahh..you are awake now. How's your sleep. Did you dream of someone...your love one. I'm so happy if you already have some one to love. You deserve it. Though I envy that girl but still I'm happy

Where are you going now? It rains so heavily outside. Just stay inside until the rain stop. Come and sit with me. Let's talk for a while. It is not so often I got a chance to be here alone with you.  Tell me your dream Jae. What do you want from life. I heard that you want to sing until you are 70. Do not worry Jae because I will be listening to you Jae. No matter what, I will always be here ..listening to your voice singing beautiful songs. Do you know my favorite songs Jae. I love when you sing Still in Love and I Will Protect You.  Listening to these songs makes me forget my misery if I had any. I can lost into my own world just accompanied by your sweet voice.  

You seems anxious Jae. Tell me who are you waiting for. Is it her ..the love of your life. Will you be walking together hand in hand by the Hans river. Strolling lazily ..enjoying the view. Will you kiss her under the full moon at night and tell her that you love her so much and you can't live without her. Oh..how romantic can that be. Again, I envy to those that able to capture your heart. Treat her nicely Jae..with your tender loving care. It's not easy to be your girlfriend, your lover and let alone to share your life day and night. There are so many out there who will go against it. But don't worry Jae, love will always find its way. I pray that one day you will find someone that can understand you and love you with all her heart and brave enough to stand by you through thick and thin. You deserve to be happy.

Why do you look at me that way, Jae? I am happy for you Jae. The rain has stopped. You can go now. I know that you are anxious to leave. Don't mind me. I will stay here a little bit longer. I just want to cherish this moment and keep it deep down in my heart. We may not see each other again. I'm sorry Jae, I told myself that I'm not going to cry when the times come. But I can't help it. It feels like somebody cut a pice of my heart and it hurt so bad. I'm going to miss you terribly. Please go now while I still can stop my heart from bursting. Goodbye Jae, I will always love you. Just remember ,though I'm not there with you, my thoughts, my prayer, my feeling and my love will always be with you.
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I'm reading this again today 8th July 2012. And yes...it still bring out tears to my eyes. I don't know why it still hurt every time I read this. Maybe because this is my most sincere feeling towards you Jae. Though I know I can't turn back the time, but there is a little space deep inside my heart still wishing I can change it.

Seeing your pics everyday does not mend this broken heart. Try to comfort myself by saying this is all fantasy ..a beautiful one .... But when is hurt so bad, sometimes I wish I never met you, never come across you in the cyber world.

Longing for you drives me insane. I know sometimes I am not being fair to my real love ...for loving someone which does not even know my existence. Yet I'm so thankful and grateful to my real love for understanding me and for supporting me through the hard time. At the same time,  my feeling towards my real love becomes deeper and deeper along with my love towards you. I could not get a better man than what I have now. My DEAR (myhoneybunnybear) ...please bear with me. I know this infatuation (you might call that) someday will disappear into the atmosphere, turn into dust ...blown away by the wind. Until then ..please stay beside me, shine me through my darkest hour, comfort me through my heartache and love me will all you might.


2 comments:

  1. Eonnie! He waited for me. I was waited for him in rain..
    LOL. I love your rendition of final encounter. I feel so much love :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I must be having a sweet Jae dream when I took my afternoon nap.

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